Saturday, March 19, 2011

I have a lovely time with anesthesia.

I just got my wisdom teeth out yesterday and I must say, I'm quite the character when I wake up from anesthesia. Well let's start off by looking at my past wakings from the sedative first. Then you'll understand that this time wasn't much different.

Oral Surgery- Exposure
A while ago before my braces came off, the dentists discovered that I had a tooth growing in the roof of my mouth sideways. The only way to bring it down was to do a procedure called an exposure in which they would cut through the gum and attach a brace to the tooth. The brace had a long chain attached to it which would be used to pull the tooth in straight. It was my second surgery using anesthesia so I wasn't all too nervous. I remember them injecting the anesthesia into the IV in my arm and being asked to count down from ten. Once I hit eight I was out. I don't recall anything that happened in the recovery room at all. I barely recall going home. All I remember is waking up to find the Nightmare Before Christmas tape playing on my tv. What happened you may ask? Well, in the recovery room I was forced to try and sit up. I went loopy and started hysterically giggling and banging my head into the wall. My parents had to hold me up to walk out because I wasn't in the right state of mind. Then they brought me to my room and when they put the video on I started singing along to every song with gauze stuffed in my mouth. 

Foot Surgery- The Removal of the Screw 
Last year I had a small mishap in November when a boy thought it would be funny to tickle me even though I told him not to. In a sad attempt to walk away I tripped over my own two feet and tore a ligament in my right foot. I was put under so they could insert a 2 inch screw into my foot. About 6 months later it was time to go back in to take it out. They gave me the anesthesia and I just remember my entire body tingling and then falling asleep. When I woke up I was a little loopy again. This time I asked the nurse for more blankets because CLEARLY the 5 that I was already using wasn't enough. After that they gave me my clothes and told me I could put them on and get ready to go. As I was putting my bra on my mother came in and asked me what the hell I was doing. Obviously you're SUPPOSED to put your bra on OVER the hospital gown right? Well I realized I was putting my clothes on wrong so of course I started hysterically laughing. For those of you who don't know, my laugh is horribly loud and obnoxious because I need to breathe. The intake of breath makes me wheeze/honk. So I'm sitting there laughing and my mother is whispering to me to shut up because the guy in the bed next to me just had back surgery. Oops.

Finally what you've all been waiting for...

Oral Surgery- Wisdom Teeth Removal
As I mentioned before I got my wisdom teeth out yesterday. Mommy dearest was at work so my dad took me. They set me up and when they injected me with anesthesia and as soon as the room started spinning I blurted out, "OH SHIT." and then passed out. I don't remember being brought into the recovery room. I barely remember the recovery room. My dad filled me in on what I did. I was lying on the table and my dad tried to make me sit up. Everytime he did I just fell over. Finally when I was sitting up I somehow got ahold of my phone. Being so attached to technology I immediatly started sending a message to twitter. I was too loopy to understand what I was typing so my fingers just slid across the entire keyboard. I ended up sending "Yteth atrwe ouutt in tyhwe rewcobvetyu room< " My dad asked me who I was trying to text and I flapped my arms and yelled "TWEET TWEET!". I proceeded to text my friends incoherent messages which loopy me deleted so there was no evidence. Then I kept trying to tell my dad "Corey" but with all the gauze in my mouth it was impossible to understand. So I tried using sign language and tried spelling it out with my hands.... which is also an impossible task for me when I'm like that apparently. He gave me his I-Phone so I could type what I was trying to say but yet again I just slid my fingers all over the keyboard and laughed. Yes my father did take pictures. Apparently I did too.....


Why yes, I AM attractive when loopy.

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Really Now?

Was I talking to you? No. Did I give the person I was talking to attitude? No, I was stating a fact. Therefore for you to bitch out at me like that was wrong. Do us all a favor and stop acting like you're queen of the world. The conversation had NOTHING to do with you in the first place so stick your nose somewhere else. On top of that you had the nerve to tell me you'd give ME respect when I stopped being a bitch? It's the other way around sweetie. So how about you do me another favor and GET REAL. You're not going to make it anywhere in life if you keep acting this way. Thanks.